We had a class in oneness university a year back and there was a session on the questions that arise in the mind. Had learnt that quality of questions that arise in the mind affects the quality of life. Contemplating and working on it over a year now, found that some common questions that arise in the mind can be categorized to,
+ Why, When, What, How etc.
These questions can lead to focusing on either the problem or solution. Solutions are always Futuristic.
When the questions of Why, What, When etc. comes up in the mind with a past context, ‘Why’ more often lead to regret.’Why’ for a happy event that happened in the past does not arise. ‘When’ many a times produced anxiety. ‘What’ though inquisitive was not so powerful.
The question ‘How‘ was so powerful that it changed the whole outlook of thinking. When ‘How’ was placed in the mind, it started making the mind more innovative. The mind was no longer worrying about any problem, but started to produce different solutions. The mind moves into finding out ways to achieve something. It always gives a good feeling while contributing something very useful to someone.
- How do I achieve something ?
- How can I make something exceptional ?
- How did you do it ?
Learnt that ‘why’ can define a purpose behind a solution that can draw people to use our products, from a ted talk, “How great Leaders inspire Action“.
Centeredness is something I had learnt in recent class. For arriving at a great solution, it is important to ignore our perspectives on something and hear the views from others shoes. This is to be ‘other-centered‘, rather than being ‘self-centered’. I realised this is ‘Art of Listening’.
This is very useful in all cases. Some cases where this has to be present for sure are,
+ While negotiating with someone
+ While dealing with customers/stake holders
One of the highly respected friends who serves in a leadership role in a big company said to me, ‘I Focus only on Future’. This was implicitly conveying a message that he was always focusing on solutions. While discussing with a senior product manager, he was speaking on the importance of listening from customers view. This implicitly conveyed about ‘other-centeredness’.
Combining the two aspects ‘Asking How’ and ‘Being Other-Centered’ takes the mind to another level which is ‘Focusing on Solutions‘ 🙂